Mother’s Day has many colors and emotions in the foster and adoptive world. Each one since we began this journey has been different, often painful and strained beneath a veneer of joy. Just because I feel blessed to be Mom to so many doesn’t mean they always feel blessed to have me! That’s especially true on a day reserved for honoring moms, when there are so many conflicting emotions to navigate. And I am never more aware than on Mother’s Day of all the motherly moments, accrued throughout the year, that I experience which are denied to their birth moms. It can only be excruciating to have lost those opportunities to love and be loved. That is why I do everything I can to be a proxy for their mothers, to love as I’d want my children to be loved were I to lose them. And also why I feel so undeserving when I fail to live up to those standards.
I am so grateful for how this Mother’s Day unfolded. Seven years and seven adoptions into our journey, we have come to a place where there was an ease and comfort and familiarity and joviality and it was so good. Many of the kids spoke on the phone with their mom and that was joy-filled as well.
Two of my three out-of-the-house kids were able to spend some time with us, and I am grateful. All the kids are so excited when their big sisters visit! I look forward to more of that as COVID-19 stay-at-home measures ease and everyone feels more comfortable getting out and about.
My pics from the day were few, but I was once again working in manual mode and really loving this process.
