Whew. Third day of the new school year down. By the end of the week I think we’ll have at least the morning routine nailed. With driving help from two big sisters, and several kiddos who are eager to start walking to and from our neighborhood school, I will have practically nothing to do all day besides looking after the one year old and the three year old and homeschooling a scatterbrained 17 year old, managing teacher meetings, medical, therapist, behavioral, eye, dental, dialysis, and prosthetic appointments for Oma and the 8 minor children in my family, and taking back the laundry and dishes jobs from my college student who has been earning summer money taking care of all that. No stress! (/sarcasm)
But I want to talk about something else that’s new around here. We’re wrapping our heads around another diagnosis – we’ve got a second ASD* kiddo in the house! Hooray for neurodiversity in all it’s multicolored splendor! While every child is unique and presents his or her own challenges and strengths, it is a blessing to have been down this road before. Understanding the differences in his “wiring” makes my job so much easier. My job, for as long as it is given to me, is, with God’s help, to assist this beautiful child in reaching his potential – spiritually, emotionally, physically, and intellectually.
I wish I could say with confidence that working in partnership with the school will lighten that load, but there are of course drawbacks, even with neurotypical kids, in traditional schooling. With ASD, there are many more opportunities for negative outcomes, especially socially. For example, a conversation I had with my little guy on the way to school today as we passed the playground:
Autistic child: I hate recess.
Mom: Why do you hate recess?
Autistic child: I hate the playground.
Mom: What do you hate about the playground? Is it the slides and the jungle gym?
Autistic child: Yes.
Mom: Do you hate all playgrounds, or just the ones at school?
Autistic child: Just the ones at school.
Mom: What is it about the school playgrounds that you don’t like?
Autistic child: Crowds.
Autistic child: Kids standing in groups.
Autistic child: Bullying.
Autistic child: Saying bad words.
Autistic child: Saying the Lord’s name in vain.
Autistic child: I just want to do my work, go the the lunchroom and eat lunch, come back to my classroom and finish working some more and then go home.
These are 2nd and 3rd graders he’s talking about. Knowing what I know now about this deeply sensitive child, I understand more the meltdowns we fought through in getting him out the door to school last year. Anxiety about this kind of thing not only gets in the way of learning while at school, it becomes a cloud of impending doom over everything he does at home as well. Obviously we’ll be keeping both eyes on how he is responding to the environment at school and make sure we are asking the right questions so he will know he can be open with us and let us know when things are going badly. Obviously we will need to keep close contact with the teachers as well, and do what we can to make this a positive school year for him.
*ASD = Autism Spectrum Disorder
The kids had fun posing for their first-day pics. Here are the many moods of Monday (and Tuesday, as Efrain started one day later than the others).
